I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
