She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
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