i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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