at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
