I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
