Dual....:-)
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
