see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
