one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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