dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
