So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Randomize
