I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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