I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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