The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
