i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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