I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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