I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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