Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
