He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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