I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
pop tarts are not kleenex
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize
