Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Randomize
