I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize