He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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