tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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