i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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