sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
