the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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