I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
she told me i tasted like america
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize