Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
