I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
literally had 100 drinks last night.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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