watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Randomize