Where did you get a picture of my penis
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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