I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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