I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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