My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
send nudes
from the living room?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
