is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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