just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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