guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
So much Jack, so little girl.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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