the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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