In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Randomize
