used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Randomize
