another moral hangover. fuck.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
