yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
