he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
