On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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