totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
