I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
