he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
