Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
