biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I love you. Go after that dick
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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