These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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